Let's laugh~ Share your jokes!!!

[Overmarzz]

A man meets a gorgeous woman in a bar. They hit if off, and end up leaving together. They get back to her place, and as she shows him around her apartment, he notices that her bedroom is littered with teddy bears.

Hundreds of small bears sit on a shelf near the floor, Medium sized bears are on the next shelf up, and huge bears line the top shelf. The man is kind of surprised that this woman would have so prolific a collection of teddy bears, but he opts not to make mention of it.

After a night of passion, as they are lying together in the afterglow, the man rolls over and asks, smiling, “Well, how was it?” The woman says, “You can have any prize from the bottom shelf.” [Maxim]

[Stream]

Nice one, LOL

[Spherix]

hehehe

[PeterB]

[Stream]

Well...it's no joke....but if you want some good laughs you should look at this site:
http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html

I think it's hilarious

[Viceroy]

Two cannibals are sitting around a campfire eating supper. The one cannibal looks over at the other one and says "Boy, your wife sure makes a good supper!"
The other cannibal says, "Yeah, I'll miss her."

I had this one teacher who tell that one all the time- he thought it was a real riot

[White_Lightning]

whats a scouser, a mackem and *beep* got in common?
theres thousands of em but only one works.....ha ha standing ovation please...... :wink:

1-0 we beat the scum 1-0

ive got loads more but im too hungover to remember them

[davehart]

-

A man walks into a salon and orders a haircut.....................lady asks the man how he would like it....................

mmmmmm, like your bush...then I can rub me hand through it all the time.

-

Made that up, pretty shit butwell.

[White_Lightning]

how many pills were u on when u made that one up???

[Spherix]

[davehart]

Never short back and side man meself.....................

[Viceroy]

[g0blin]

A panda walks into a 5-Star restaurant.

The waiter is all freaked out, cause there's this panda in the restaurant, so he runs and tells the Maitre-D.

The Maitre-D tells the waiter he'll handle it. So he goes over to the panda, very cautiously, and tries to coax it out of the restaurant.

Instead, the panda sits by a table, knocks open the menu, and motions toward the Salmon Steak.

In awe, the Maitre-D decides its best to let the panda have some food, and maybe call Animal Control while its eating. So he has the waiter bring out the order.

The panda quickly gulps down its meal, stands up, pulls out a pistol, and caps the waiter.

The Maitre-D, in more shock than ever, comes running back to the table. Furious, he screams at the panda. "You stupid panda, you march into my 5-Star restaurant, and like that's not a big enough scene, you killed my best waiter in cold blood, and scared off my clientelle! What the hell am I supposed to do?!

The panda casually gets up and says "Hey... I'm a panda. Look it up in an encyclopedia!" and then he walks out.

Finding an encyclopedia, the Maitre-D reads: "Panda: A rare bearlike mammal (Ailuropoda melanoleuca) of the mountains of China and Tibet, having woolly fur with distinctive black and white markings. Eats chutes and leaves.

[Viceroy]

That's a good one. Think I've heard it somewhere else before though,

[davehart]

Nice joke. Dunny why but Im never a fan of longer jokes, reading them takes the fun out it

[g0blin]

the fun is in the telling... making people go thru all that reading / listening, for such a weak punch :)

[Stream]

great one g0blin

[Spherix]